{"id":572,"date":"2025-11-15T05:11:49","date_gmt":"2025-11-15T06:11:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/?p=572"},"modified":"2025-11-20T15:38:15","modified_gmt":"2025-11-20T15:38:15","slug":"do-you-have-the-right-lens-i-dont-not-yet","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/2025\/11\/15\/do-you-have-the-right-lens-i-dont-not-yet\/","title":{"rendered":"Do You Have The Right Lens? I Don’t, Not Yet"},"content":{"rendered":"
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It snowed yesterday where I live, so it’s time for a sleighride song. This ditty is sung to the tune of Jingle Bells<\/em> and is called “Wannabe’s Lament.” It’s a cheerful tune about the photographer I could have been, if only I’d had the right equipment.<\/p>\n

Play it in your head. Read \/ sing it to the tune of Jingle Bells<\/em>.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

I Snapchat all the time.
\nOn Instagram I star.
\nI want to turn professional
\nI know <\/em>I can go far!<\/p>\n

They say I have \u201cthe eye.\u201d
\nI do everything I should.
\nI\u2019d be a great photographer
\nBut my lens is just no good.<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

Oh, I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nTo buy some new glass.
\nThis old lens is for amateurs
\nIt\u2019s a pain in the (woops!).<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nTo buy some new glass.
\nMaybe Santa Claus
\nWill bring a lens that\u2019s long and fast.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Second Verse<\/em><\/p>\n

I know I could turn pro.
\nEarn enough to pay the rent.
\nBut I don\u2019t have the dough
\nTo buy the equipment.<\/p>\n

With talent I am flush.
\nI really have the knack.
\nI took a mail order course
\nBut this old lens holds me back.<\/p>\n

Chorus <\/em>(chorus changes, so don’t skim over it)<\/p>\n

Oh, I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nTo buy some new glass.
\nThis old lens is for amateurs
\nIt\u2019s a pain in the (woops!)<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nCan\u2019t you see I\u2019m scared?
\n\u201cDecisive moments\u201d pass by me
\nWhile I\u2019m optically impaired.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Third Verse<\/em><\/p>\n

Surfing on the \u2018net
\nLooking for a lens.
\nFound a zoom but it costs more
\nThan a Mercedes Benz.<\/p>\n

A macro would be nice.
\nOr maybe a fast prime.
\nI\u2019d buy them both but for the fact
\nThat I don\u2019t have a dime.<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

Oh, I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nTo buy some new glass.
\nThis old lens is for amateurs
\nIt\u2019s a pain in the (woops!).<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nAll my money\u2019s gone.
\nBut I really need the lens
\nThat got 5 Stars on Amazon.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Fourth Verse<\/em><\/p>\n

I know all about
\nf-stops and stuff like that.
\nI got a lot of practice
\nTaking pictures of my cat.<\/p>\n

I guess I could buy used.
\nYou know what they say.
\nYou can find some bargains if
\nYou spend time on Fleabay.<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

Oh, I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nTo buy some new glass.
\nThis old lens is for amateurs
\nIt\u2019s a pain in the (woops!).<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go.
\nBut I\u2019ll be in a fix
\nIf I keep taking pictures with
\nA worn out iPhone 6.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Fifth Verse<\/em><\/p>\n

I\u2019ll get some better gear.
\nI\u2019ll buy a better lens.
\nI’ll show that I\u2019m professional
\nTo all my Facebook friends.<\/p>\n

A zoom lens would be nice.
\nFisheye\u2019s are cool, too.
\nAny lens that\u2019s not made from
\nA Coke bottle will do.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

Oh, I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nSearching far and near.
\nI\u2019d be a great photographer
\nBut I can\u2019t afford the gear.<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know
\nWhere to go
\nTo raise cash. Please tell me:
\nDo you think I could set up an
\nAccount on GoFundMe?<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

\u00a9 Jon Sienkiewicz, who would have been a much better writer if only he\u2019d had a better typewriter instead of being so damn handsome.<\/p>\n

\u2014Jon Sienkiewicz<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It snowed yesterday where I live, so it’s time for a sleighride song. This ditty…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":574,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[14],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/572"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=572"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/572\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":573,"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/572\/revisions\/573"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/574"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=572"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=572"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kartramail.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=572"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}